Confessions of Comic Book Writer Database

Spider Man: Protection

2009-10-28T15:33:00.003-05:00

Spiderman: Protection

Yet another offering from my friend Scott L. He was nice enough to come up with this great offering of Spiderman: Protection. Thanks again man!

Spider Man: Devil's Advocate

2009-10-28T15:28:00.003-05:00

Spiderman: Devil's Advocate

Again here's some finished work of one of my sample scripts. This one was done by TGK on penciljack (my apologies for not having your full name man, i don't think i ever got it, so please contact me and let me know)

New Avengers Part I

2009-10-28T15:22:00.002-05:00

New Avengers Script (Old School Marvel Script)

Here's a look at what a friend of mine, scott L, drew up for me. I did the inks on these (long long ago when my inking skills were even MORE sucktacular lol). Just for a quick refresher, Old school marvel scripts are written with action first and dialogue AFTER the art is drawn. Let me tell you this is NOT easy. I nearly pulled my hair out on this one. The action in this takes place after Bendis' New Avengers Issue #26

Avengers Part II

2009-10-28T15:17:00.001-05:00

2008-06-03T14:55:00.002-05:00

Table of Contents:

Thunderstruck (8pg Zatanna/Capt. Marvel "Shazam" script for contest on uggabugga.net)

Stamford Script (7 pg Civil War Dr. Strange Script)

Old School Marvel Style Script (5 pg Scarlet Witch/Hawkeye/Dr. Strange Script)

Protection (4 pg spidey script for Spiderman Loves Mary Jane)

Devil's Advocate (3pg spidey script)

Curfew (an early comic exercise i did just for kicks)

Confidant (original 5pg script created for contest on penciljack.com)

Hindsight (original 5 pg script, winner of penciljack.com modern pirate story contest)

"Thunderstruck" - Zatanna and Captain Marvel (Shazam) 8pg Sample Script

2008-06-02T23:20:00.004-05:00

Captain Marvel and Zatanna are copywrite of DC comics.

"Thunderstruck"
ielle palmer - 2008

Page One, Four Panels

Panel 1: We see the interior of a museum late at night. A large creature is smashing through a wall
causing various ancient artifacts to be demolished or go flying through the air. This creature (which is some sort of basilisk, an 8 legged lizzard with a spiked back, extremely long tail, forked tongue and claws for toes. Basically a mutant baby of a Gila Monster and balding porcupine).

We can also see that attached to this creature is Zatanna, her body failing out behind her as if it’s flying. She is holding onto a magical lasso (a TRUE magical lasso one made of light not shiny thread like wonder woman’s) which is looped about the creature’s neck. Her other hand is holding onto her top hat.

Fx: SMASH!

Monster: SKRREEEEEEEEEEE!!

Zatanna: Aohw! I dias AOHW!

Panel 2: The creature begins to buck like a horse. Zatanna is tossed upwards, her hat can be seen flying
away on its own now. She magically gestures with her newly free hand down at the creature.

Z: Erutaerc eb lilts!

Panel 3: the creature’s spiked tail smashes into a display, utterly ravaging it. The valuable artifact (possibly a bust or a vase) encased within it is about to fall.

Fx: KERRRASH!

Panel 4: Zatanna, thrusts her free hand out at the artifact.

Z: dloh ereht!

Page Two, Seven Panels

Panel 1: The artifact is now frozen in mid-air. A Magical aura surrounds it.

Panel 2: Extreme close up of Zatanna sighing in relief.

Panel 3: Same Angle, suddenly Zatanna’s look of relief has been replaced with a more surprised
expression. Almost as if she’s been goosed.

Z: Oh--

Panel 4: The Basilisk kicks up the last two sets of its 8 legs and launches Zatanna like a rag doll for the
opposing wall.

Z: tttttttiiiiiihhhssss!

Panel 5: Zatanna is rising from the ruble, various suits of armor and weapons are scattered around her.

Z: That’s it DINO. Screw my membership to PETA, some things DESERVE extinction!

Panel 6: The Basilisk lines itself up like a bull as Zatanna rolls up her sleeves. The main focus on this
page is how large the Basilisk's mouth is as it's jaw almost unhinges to let out an unholy
scream.

Monster: SKREEEEEE

Panel 7: Tight shot of Zatanna, her eyes narrowing in determination.

Z: Listerine – look into it.

Page Three – 5 Panels

Panel 1: The Basilisk charges.

Panel 2: Zatanna holds a pose that looks like it could both be for dramatic effect and combat reasons (artist choice). She continues to glare the monster down.

Z: This is MY world, Godzilla. Nruter morf Ecnehw voy emac!

Panel 3: Mid-Leap the basilis hangs directly above Zatanna. The upper part of his body is returning to
stone, while its tail is still flesh. Magicial rays of light and rune symbols within the light encircle
its body.

Panel 4: Zatanna looking up completely shadowed by the basilisk. She's suddenly realized that she's
under the mammoth slab of falling rock.

Z: Aw crap.

Panel 5: Same Angle, a blue of red tackles Zatanna from the side, shoving her out of the way. We see
mostly speedlines and a faint outline of her body.

Z: Huuuurrrp!

Page Four – 6 Panels

Panel 1: Zatanna is holding her head while laying in a pile of rubble. The wall behind her has been split,
with pieces of debris all around. We can see someone's head just about smushed into her
breasts.

Z: Ugh, FLASH. great to see you, but couldn't you have at least pulled--

Panel 2: Zatanna trying to pull away as she realizes some strange man (Capt. Marvel) is bear hugging
her, pressing his face up into her cleavage and wincing as if he's bracing for an explosion.

Z: You're not the Flash –- did you just cop a FEEL?

Panel 3: Marvel has pushed himself back. Their legs are still tangled up and they remain on the ground,
but he too has edged back as far as he can, turning eight shades of red. Zatanna is looking
down as she adjusts her top.

M: Ohmahgosh! I didn't, I mean to do -- I would never, uh not say that you're not h--

Z: Forget it. You saved my life, we'll call it a draw.

Panel 4: Now standing, Marvel tries to be a gentleman and NOT watch as Zatanna goes about the
business of fixing her fishnet stockings.

M: Y-your Zatanna, right?

Z: That's what the bill collectors tell me. Nice cape, by the way...uh LIGHTNING guy?

Panel 5: Marvel takes up his standard hero pose with his hands on his hips

M: CAPTAIN MARVEL

Panel 6: CU of Zatanna staring at him in disbelief and mild amusement.

Z: Of course you are.

Page Five – 5 Panels

Panel 1: Zatanna is walking out of the rubble and heading for the museum exit. Capt. Marvel sprints to
keep up.

M: Hey! Hey we did really great as a team back there!

Z: What are you talking about?

Panel 2: Marvel steps in front of Zatanna blocking her way. His body language is similar to an excited
child. Meanwhile Zatanna is looking at him as if he's crazy.

M: We should work together, you know um... again. Your skills, my brawn.

Z: Uh, sure. Why dontcha have your people call my people.

Panel 3: Marvel turns to watch Zatanna keep walking.

M: You have people! That's so cool!

Panel 4: Marvel is hovering behind Zatanna (who is still walking away without looking back at him).
They are passing an exhibit on cavemen. One of the cavemen is dragging a cavewoman by
her hair back to the cave.

M: But, I was kinda thinking of right now.

Z: Uh, show's over big guy. We won.

M: But that's not why MY people sent me.

Panel 5: Zatanna, after obviously giving up on shaking this guy, stops and turns to address Marvel.

Z (small): You actually HAVE people?

Z (linked and regular size): Ok, I give, why ARE you here if not for the runaway Jurassic Park
ride?

Page Six – 6 Panels

Panel 1: Int. caves far below the museum. It looks like something out of temple of doom. Fire and brimstone coming out of a pit. Hundreds of worshipers chanting as a high priestess is doing a ceremony over an alter about to slam a knife through a screaming child's chest. Way up at the top we see Marvel and Zatanna peaking out from one of the many holes in the cave walls.

Z: Holy &*$%

CAPTION: Moments later

Panel 2: Zatanna leans closer to Marvel, making him look a bit uncomfortable as she whispers to him.

Z: Should I be covering my heart?

M: Huh?

Z: Nevermind, lets do this.

Panel 3: Marvel and Zatanna having jumped over the side, land on the platform near the lava, Zatanna
is closest to the large medallion of the lizard she just killed.

Z (OP): Hey Captain Terrific, I know this symbol. It's Kar'vel.

M (OP): Carvel? The ice cream?

Panel 4: Zatanna rolls her eyes as she uses her magic to trap a few of the angry mob in a force field like bubble. Meanwhile Marvel smashes two guys together while a third is clinging to his back
comically.

Z: Yes, Carvel the ice cream.

M: Really?

Z: NO! It's the thing from the library, the basilisk! He's their god.

Panel 5: Marvel tosses the guy from his back into an oncoming group of other worshipers, knocking
them all down.

M: Hey that's neat. Our cases are related!

Panel 6: Zatanna again raises an eyebrow at his behavior. We can see the priestess sneaking up behind
her, holding her dagger high.

Z: Yeah -- neat.

Page Seven – 7 Panels

Panel 1: We see Marvel (still having worshipers attempting to jump on him) suddenly blow a huge gust
of wind at Zatanna, knocking her up off her feet and back.

Z: Hey, watch it!

Panel 2: Zatanna crashes into the wall, crushing the Priestess behind her, knocking her out.

Panel 3: The worshipers stop, some look surprised. Others are kneeling praying. Zatanna looks behind
her and sees the woman is out cold. Marvel stands heroically.

Z: What the – oh. Nice.

Panel 4: Marvel Leans down and offers Zatanna a hand up like a gentleman. Suddenly Zatanna seems
to regard him with much more respect.

M: Need a hand?

Z: Thanks.

Panel 5: Zatanna steps closer to Marvel, putting her hand on his chest. She looks up at him dreamily as he looks around at the beaten worshipers.

M: They quit fighting.

Z: Most tribes do when you take out the leader. Look, I'm sorry about earlier. I was
wondering if maybe I could make it up to you.

Panel 6: Marvel suddenly looks back at her alarmed.

M: Uh. Well, that'd be great but -- *sigh* I think you should know something.

Panel 7: CU of Zatanna's eyes bulging.

M (OP): Sha-ZAM!

Page Eight – 3 Panels

Panel 1: Int. Zatanna's dressing room, later that evening. CU of Black Canary laughing her ass off.

BC: A KID! He's a KID?

CAPTION: Later

Panel 2: Zatanna is sitting by her dressing room mirror pouting. Black Canary is leaning against the door
laughing.

BC: Oh god! Oh, Ollie has to hear this.

Z: I don't know why I tell you anything.

Panel 3: Zatanna continues to pout as a stage hand opens the door. Black Canary is on the phone.

SH: 5 Minutes til curtain Miss Zatanna.

BC: Ollie? Your what? Look, forget Deathstroke, wait 'til you get a load of THIS!

Z: Gaaahhhh!

Old School marvel-style script feat. Scarlet Witch, Hawkeye and Dr. Strange 5pgs

2007-06-05T21:28:00.003-05:00

Old School Marvel-Style Script

This was created for a friend. He's using it for a submission to marvel. I'll post the dialogue after i create it. I'm waiting for the artwork to come back before both trying to come up with stuff. But at least you can get the idea.

Picks up where the scarlet witch/Hawkeye in the New Avengers (issue 26) left off.

Pg 1 summary
Hawkeye wanders the small streets of the tiny rustic Swiss/Germanic village (Wundagore Mountain is it actual name) which Wanda is hiding out in. (see New Avengers Issue# 26). He’s shopping alone in the open market for vegetables, out of uniform obviously (he left it at what was left of avengers mansion). Basic breakdown of the dialogue in this scene (so you know what kind of facial expressions you’ll need and such). He’s bartering with a fruit vender while thinking over the events of the previous night (sleeping with Wanda and her having absolutely no idea who he is or the avengers). He feels a bit guilty and he’s very concerned over what she’s become. He hems and haws over if he should tell anyone she’s there, turn her in, tell her who she really is or just let her live out her life in ignorant bliss. Suddenly the SHIELD HELICARRIER flies over head (this thing is massive and blocks out the sun most times). Hawkeye immediately recognizes that they’re there for Wanda; he drops his groceries and runs up the hill towards her house.

Pg 2 summary
Reaching her home (which is near the top of course). He sees SHIELD AGENTS covering the place. The lead agent is questioning a crying Wanda (mostly about where she’s been, and what is in the backroom of her small home – which FYI, marvel has been hinting that she has her dead aunt locked up in there like Norman Bates). She, like Hawkeye is sitting about in street clothing. The Agent appears to be a real dick yelling at her. At this point Hawkeye makes his move taking out an agent who has his back to him. He begins to take out the small group of ground troops that are guarding the front door. Feel free to improvise a page worth of fighting. (Don’t worry about the captain America-esk throwing of a garbage lid just yet; I’d save that for page 3, personally). Wanda sees him from out the window just as the lead agent also sees what’s going on outside. Wanda can’t believe what he’s doing (again remember she thinks he's a normal guy, not a trained fighting machine with a temper).

Pg 3 summary
The fight continues, however just as Hawkeye looks like he’s getting the upper hand he looks up to see more agents coming down from the helicarrier. This doesn’t seem to anger or disappoint him though. In fact he appears to thrive off it. A sick grin crosses his face. More fighting. Now is when I’d use the Captain America shot, in my opinion. Interspersed with this should be Wanda’s growing concern for Hawkeye’s safety. She’s watching this through her window of her small sparse home (again I’d look at New Avengers Issue 26 for references) The Agent angrily gives the order to take Hawkeye out and stop playing with him. He also tells another Agent beside him to “get that back room open” (this refers to the room in Issue 26 that perhaps Wanda keeps her dead aunt in). Wanda freaks, her eyes glow and her face looks evil as she calmly tells them off. (of course feel free to go back and forth from action to these panels where Wanda is stressing or whatever).

Pg 4 summary
Wanda bursts from her house, dark phoenix style levitating and holding both agents up by their throats, Darth Vader style. Her eyes are still glowing angry as she addresses the men that Hawkeye has been fighting, telling them to leave before things get worse. Hawkeye looks up at her, shocked and concerned that her powers have come out again. He calls her name. She looks over at him, crying because part of her still does not know what’s happening to her. She begins to take out various agents around Hawkeye as he tells her not to kill them. They banter back and forth about how killing won’t make it better. He tells her that she once hurt everyone and she can’t do that again. Wanda remembers killing him; this shocks her into releasing everyone. Hawkeye pulls her close and tells her that he forgives her. The lead agent tells his men to stop gawking and move in. Just as he does says this, the agents are hit by a wave of energy

Pg 5 summary

Dr. Strange appears telling them to SLEEP. Everyone passes out, including Wanda who is still in Hawkeye’s arms. However Hawkeye and Dr. Strange are very much awake. Dr. Strange tells him how Wanda’s re-awakened powers finally let him find her and that for her own safety; he (Dr. Strange) should take her away now. To get her the help she truly needs. Hawkeye relents and passes her over, however he insists on going with them. Dr. Strange tells Hawkeye there are more important things for him to do now and that in time, he can come and visit her if he wishes. They leave Hawkeye standing amid a sleeping town, lost and confused.

- end -

"Stamford Script" feat Dr. Strange - 7pgs

2007-06-05T21:18:00.003-05:00

Stamford Script – 7 Pages

Page One – Three Panels

Panel One: mid-day outside of a large elementary/middle school. There is a large track and an even larger playground and soccer field nearby. 13 year-old girls in gym uniforms are running a baton relay on the track.

Panel Two: Isabelle Duncan (IZZY) stands in the foreground spacing out at something OP (off panel). Her face is utterly blank, her arms hanging at her sides. Behind her we can wee other girls running her direction, determined and carrying batons.

Panel Three: IZZY is slammed into by ANN, her baton partner. Both are knocked off balance and forward. The baton files upward out of control.

Izzy: Oof!

Partner: Ow, IZZY!

Page Two – Five Panels

Panel One: IZZY and ANN are sprawled out on the track. ANN is glaring at IZZY while holding her own knee in pain. IZZY continues to be transfixed with something OP. behind them the gym COACH is angrily marching to the scene followed by a small pack of giggling girls.

COACH: This is NOT rocket science girls. What part of PASS the baton are we not getting, MISS DUNCAN?

IZZY: I-I saw something.

COACH: I’m sure. Back to your blocks, girls! We’re doing it AGAIN!

Panel Two: COACH and the girls are OP now. IZZY scowls, upset that no one believes her. WHILE ANN storms off, walking backwards and gesturing angrily back to IZZY (who is not looking at her). Behind them another girl, TARA, is looking off into the direction IZZY has been staring.

ANN: Thanks a ton, IZZY

IZZY: Look, someone flew over the trees!

ANN: Right -- You’re so WEIRD.

Panel Three: IZZY bites her lip angrily, glaring off into the direction she was staring before. TARA is far behind her also calmly looking in that direction. (no dialogue)

Panel Four: SAME ANGLE. IZZY's face is now one of disapointment and shame. Behind her TARA is running towards her, almost skipping in delight (no dialogue)

TARA: Omygawd, Ohmygawd!

Panel Five: TARA shoves IZZY aside to get by her. IZZY Looks at her as if she's lost her mind. TARA on the other hand is so happy she could explode.

TARA: It’s the NEW WARRIORS!

Page Three, four panels

Panel One: Shot of the ENTIRE gym class from behind as they try to get a better view through the chain-link fence that surrounds the track. COACH is waving his clipboard and free hand at the girls in an attempt to herd them away. IZZY stands alone in the foreground, forgotten.

COACH: Ok, let’s go! It’s not like you haven’t seen them on TV.

GIRL: Can you see SPEEDBALL? He’s hot!

TARA: NAMORITA’S hair is so cool. Why’d I get stuck with poop brown?

GIRL3: Quit stepping on me, ANN!

ANN: MOVE, I can’t see!

Panel Two: We see Nitro with no boots on, but half in his costume (see Civil War 1 for reference) jumping over the side of a nearby neighborhood wooden fence.

GIRL 5 (OP): Hey, he’s getting away! Who is that?

Panel Three: Close in on IZZY, as she once again looks to be lost in some sort of trance. Her body limp, her face blank. Other Children are playing far behind her at the playground.

IZZY (in her trance): We aren’t the bargain basement losers you guys are USED to, baby.

COACH (OP): INSIDE NOW!

IZZY (small): Benny.

Panel Four: IZZY bolts away from her class, which is filing back towards the school. Her COACH shouts after her. ANN is standing beside him, puzzled by IZZY’s behavior.

Izzy: I need to find my brother!

COACH: Duncan, I said INSIDE! -- ISABELLE! -- Dammit! Detention, ALL AROUND!

ANN: What’d WE do?

COACH (smaller): Just get inside.

Page Four, Six panels

Panel One: IZZY is running across the busy playground, frantic. In the far background we can see NAMORITA flying up over the trees.

Izzy: BEN!

Panel Two: A small boy is crying on the floor of a hallway. IZZY has just accidently knocked the boy down. A teacher’s aide is attending to the little boy and angrily snapping at IZZY. IZZY has slightly turned (but not slowed down) to look back apologetically. The outside is still closing from where IZZY just crashed through it.

IZZY: I’m sorry!

AIDE: Young ladies WALK in hallways!

Panel Three: IZZY bursts into her brother’s classroom where the children are having story time now. The TEACHER looks up at the door, startled.

TEACHER: Isabelle?

IZZY: Mrs. Mauro, where’s Ben?

TEACHER: Benjamin? But MISS WATSON just took him to see you. He wouldn’t stop crying.

Panel Four: IZZY takes a moment at the corner of a hallway full of windows (a few open) to catch her breath. Her hands are on her slightly bent knees, propping the rest of her tired body up.

NAMORITA (OP): On your feet NITRO and don’t try any of your stupid explosions because--

Panel Five: Upright now and back in her trance, IZZY has approached the open window. Through it we can see NAMORITA standing over Nitro who is leaning on a bus across the school yard.

IZZY (in trance): -- because that’s only going to make me hit you harder.

BEN (OP): IZZY!

Panel Six: Standing near a set of hallway firedoors, MISS WATSON looks relieved as BEN runs open armed towards IZZY. They boy can’t be more than 5. His little soup-bowl-cut straight hair flops as he runs. He has been crying, but he seems so happy now. IZZY also has snapped out of her trance-like state.

Izzy: BEN!

Page Five, Four panels

Panel One: IZZY has picked her brother up and is stroking his head. Her back is to us, but BEN’s content face is directly in view. He couldn’t be happier or feel safer. Past them, through the windows we can see that the world is going WHITE.

IZZY: It’s ok BEN. We’re not here.

IZZY (linked and in trance): We’re NOT here.

Panel Two: Close up of IZZY keeping her own eyes shut. The lighting should be burning bright now.

Izzy (trance): We’re NOT here.

Panel Three: OUTSIDE, birds-eye view of the school yard, children and all go up in one big nuclear blast. No dialogue.

Panel Four: IZZY opens one cautious eye. The light is cool and calm now.

DR. STRANGE (OP): You’re ABSOLUTELY right my dear. But perhaps you’d be kind enough to tell me why you’re HERE instead?

Page Six, Six Panels:

Panel One: DR. STEPHEN STRANGE stands nearby looking inquisitively down at IZZY and BEN (whom she’s still holding). Both children appear surprised. They are nowhere, or rather a white void.

Izzy: Where -- How--

DR. STRANGE: How exactly! Forgive me but, you’ve surprised me and that so rarely happens anymore. It’s a bit refreshing, actually. Allow me to introduce myself, I am DR. STEPHEN STRANGE.

Ben: NO NEEDLES!

Panel Two: Smirking, DR. STRANGE is snaps his fingers to conjure up a lollipop. BEN seems delighted by this act, but IZZY raises a distrusting eyebrow.

SNDFX: Snap!

DR. STRANGE: I wholeheartedly agree, son. Walk with me.

IZZY: Why should I?

Panel Three: Close in on DR. STRANGE. He raises an amused eyebrow.

DR. STRANGE: My dear, you’re ALONE. BETWEEN realms and you’re worried about STRANGER DANGER? -- Just follow me.

Panel Four: High angle of the trio walking. There is absolutely no background. BEN is clinging to IZZY as they follow DR. STRANGE, making it hard for her to walk.

DR. STRANGE: ISABELLE DUNCAN, correct?

IZZY: Maybe.

DR. STRANGE: You’re not about to make this easy for me, are you? Very well. Isabelle, I’m afraid I have some bad news.

IZZY: I’m dead.

Panel Five: DR. STRANGE stops to look back at her, startled.

Dr. Strange: What? No, why does EVERYONE assume that here? Honestly, do you think the afterlife would be THIS dull?

IZZY: I was hoping it was a waiting room.

Panel Six: A visibly frustrated DR. STRANGE moves his hands in various magical poses. A ring of magic begins to open space (like parting a cloud) in the void beside them revealing blue sky. BEN’s jaw drops in delight. IZZY however, is holding him protectively behind her. She raises a skeptical eye.

DR. STRANGE: I can see words alone will not satisfy you. I’m afraid I have some bad news.

Page Seven, Five Panels

Panel One: The void around the portal, STRANGE has opened is swirling and turning a dark shade of gray. Inside it we can see and aerial view of the nuclear devastation that has hit Stamford, CT.

Dr. Strange (OP): You’re a lucky girl, Miss Duncan.

Panel Two: Close in on IZZY. She tears up as the reality of it all is sinks in.

IZZY: I knew it BEFORE it happened.

DR. STRANGE (OP): Yes, I know.

IZZY: And I brought us HERE?

DR. STRANGE (OP): Yes my dear, it would seem that you did.

Panel Three: DR. STRANGE is looking sadly at the portal (which is OP). Behind him IZZY looks up hopefully at his words. BEN is OP.

DR. STRANGE: ISABELLA DUNCAN, daughter of SAMUEL K and MARIA BREWER DUNCAN, you are something extraordinary.

IZZY: Like you?

Panel Four: DR. STRANGE turns to look back at IZZY, once again amused by her words. One of his hands is waving back at the portal behind him causing it to reseal. IZZY stands in the foreground, BEN’s head can just be seen at her waist. He’s clinging to her still.

DR. STRANGE: Heh, not exactly. But I have met your like you before. Another natural -- SHE was a conundrum. A very dangerous conundrum. One which I made the mistake of dismissing once before. I will NOT make that mistake again.

DR. STRANGE (linked): So, shall we begin?

IZZY: I don’t understand.

Panel Five: Birds eye view of DR. STRANGE leading the children off into the void. He has BEN’s hand. IZZY is following him more closely now, listening to his everyword.

DR. STRANGE: Well of course! What would be the point of me TEACHING you, then?

BEN: But, there’s no more school.

DR. STRANGE: This is a DIFFERENT school. And after a short conversation with your parents, whom I’m sure will be VERY relived to see you both. I have no doubt, that You and I, Miss Duncan, will be seeing much more of each other.

2007-03-20T14:24:00.002-05:00

Hindsight
Ielle Palmer

2006

Page One, Four Panels:

Panel One: EXT - City Docks - Evening. A paper boat travels a bit and promptly sinks.

Caption 1: I used to see it as a game, really --

Panel Two: We revealing an older gentleman dressed in early fall clothing, approaching another person, a young woman in an oversized pea coat with short bright red hair, nearly blood red who is looking off across the docks at the boats.

Man: Miss, was that your boat?

Panel Three: She looks past him, smiling, and we suddenly realize that her eyes are completely white, perhaps with a tinge of silver where her pupils should be.

Caption 2: A thrill, something to pass the day.

Faye: yes, but you can keep it. I always make more. Good evening.

Panel Four: Her walking cane snaps out beside her, and she begins to walk off, leaving the man to gape after her.

Page Two, Six Panels:

Panel One: Ext - Docks - Cont’d. LS of Faye, wandering down a dock in a busy city harbor, while workers are trying to unload various cargo ships.

Caption Three: You see, the problem was how easy it came to me.

Panel Two: Medium shot of her feeling about the various crates sitting down. A foreman takes notice and shouts at her. She doesn’t hear him over the machinery.

Foreman: Lady! Whada ya, deaf? Look -- MISS, you can’t be hanging round here.

Faye: Sorry, what?

Foreman: What are you doing here?

Panel Three: Faye smiles and points up. The foreman is giving her a look as if she’s crazy.

Faye: The cranes.

Foreman: The cranes?

Faye: They’re soothing.

Foreman: They’re sooth- HA! Ah ha ha ha. Can’t say I’ve heard em called that before. But hey you can’t stay here, miss. I ain’t got insurance for an audience.

Panel Four: Faye leans forward so her eyes glow.

Caption Four: The lying --

Faye: I understand, but you see-

Foreman: Jesus Christ!

Panel Five: MS of the foreman and Faye facing off. The foreman seem's to be weakening.

Faye: So many sounds in this town, and well -- this is the best way to drown them all out. You wouldn’t deny me a bit of peace, would you?

Foreman: Go sit at the front of the dock, then. Guys’ll be less likely to drop sumpthun on yer head there. But you give me any problems or I see my boys taking five with ya and yer outta here, got it?

Panel Six: CU of Faye looking a bit evil while smiling, she slinks back into the shadows, her silver white eyes the only thing showing.

Faye: Got it.

Page Three, Five Panels:

Panel One: Ext. Dock - Later. Wide angle of the last of the dockmen locking the gate to leave for the night.

Caption Five: -- The waiting --

Panel Two: A solitary watchman begins to settled down in his booth by the gate with his coffee and magazine.

Panel Three: Faye steps from the shadows, peeling off her pea coat. Her eyes still white, but her cane nowhere in sight.

Panel Four: Back to the watchman in his booth. He is watching some show on his tiny tv while adjusting the sandwich he’s brought with him. He sings along with a jingle on the tv.

Watchman & TV: It’s fizzy it’s funny, you get more for yer money... it’s Bungee.. An active drink, for an active life.

Panel Five: Below him, faye has pressed herself against the outside of the booth, a blackjack in her hand. Suddenly his phone rings.

Watchman: ‘Allo? Wha... oh what have I told you about calling me when I’m at work? ... Yeah, I know... well I missed ya too. But Kim you can’t keep calling me, what if my boss stopped in. Yeah I know he never does.

Watchman: So, have you felt it kick tonight? When what happened? While watching American idol, well, I’d kick ya too if you made me watch that shit. What, no I’m not watching it now.

Page Four, Five Panels:

Panel One: CU of the watchman's hand scrambling to turn the volume off.

TV: Welcome back, our judges will be releasing-

Panel Two: Reaction of Faye listening to him. She's near tears. She can see a light coming from the water towards the docks.

Watchman: Yeah... no I love you too. Babe, I’m watching an bunch of boats sit dead in the water. What’s gonna happen, I get dry rot? Yes I know. No, I know that too. Well that was a few weeks ago and it was in New York. Who the hell would want something in Jersey? Right, I know.... I know. Kimberly! Christ I know, okay? Breathe. The doctor told you, you can keep stressing yourself out like-

Faye (quietly): Shit.

Panel Three: The watchman has his back to Faye, who is posed to strike, her blackjack in hand. The light is getting closer

Watchman: Okay, uh huh. Yup -- yup -- yup. Okay, I gotta go. Seriously. Okay. Uh huh. Love you too. See you in a couple of hours. Bye.

Cellphone closing fx: Snap!

Watchman: What the hell-

Panel Four: CU of his hand rolling towards the phone. Suddenly a blackjack comes down onto it.

Caption Six: -- and the attack.

Panel Five: He cries out and crumbles to the floor of the small booth. Faye is pressing her foot onto his already injured hand, she raps him over the nose, causing it to shoot blood every which way.

Watchman: P-please -- please --

Faye: Keys.

Watchman: I-I’m having a baby.

Faye: Keys.

Watchman: Oh christ -- your eyes!

Page Five, Five Panels:

Panel One: Faye raps him again, this time breaking his other hand causing him to scream.

Faye: KEYS!

Watchman: right drawer, right drawer! Oh god, please don’t kill me. Please. Not like this. Take whatever you want. They’ve got tons of stuff on there still! Computers -- TVs -- cellphones! Just please, I don’t want to die!

Panel Two: She looks to see the light has turned out to be a medium sized boat, which has pulled up to the dock, men are beginning to get off. One looks rather important. She is frowning.

Faye: what's your feeling about headaches?

Panel Three: Faye, toying with the keys, unlocks a the gate where a truck is waiting. gets up and goes to the gate, hurrying to unlock it. Another man is waiting on the other side.

Blythe: Took you long enough, Marlowe won’t be pleased.

Faye: You’re in, aren’t you?

Panel Four: Medium Shot of a very imposing, but sleek male standing on the dock, watching other scruffy looking strong men load the truck.

Caption Seven: “Talent’s talent,” he tells me, “an’ ya don’t squander
God’s gift, lovey”

Panel Five: CU of the man's grinning, showing off his golden teeth.

Caption Eight: Wonder if he knows where he can stick this gift.

2007-03-20T13:55:00.002-05:00

Confidant

Ielle Palmer

2006

Page One, Three Panels:
Panel One: CU of a female hand wearing a short leather gauntlet, snapping back to catch a large rubber bouncy-ball.

Psychic (O.P): Yes well, I see boff a positive ann ah neegative here cheyel…

Panel Two: Loose CU of the owner of the hand (MARE) rolling the ball over the back of her hand before her face as she hold a cellphone to her ear. She’s alone in a very very small studio apartment. Her walls are covered with news clippings and posters giving the whole place a very urban punk style. Her windows have dark bed sheets drawn over them. MARE seems to be taking this phone call very serious, her face looking very concerned.

PSYCHIC (O.P over the phone): The star Thanh Long ’ll help ya make yourself noooticed and ta be in good shape, mary, and magnanimous.

MARE: Right, so where this catch?

Panel Three: Medium LS of MARE stretching in front of a mirror in her crappy studio apartment. We can see that it only has enough room for a full-sized bed (which is unmade and messy), a small desk with a laptop (and a ton of junk paper) and a microwave and a Chinese changing screen which is partially blocking a toilet and sink in the corner. She lets her ball drop into the overflowing wastepaper basket beside the desk.

PSYCHIC (O.P.): Be patient cheyel, ders moe good news.

MARE: *sigh* Sorry. Hold on a sec,

Page Two, Four Panels:

Panel One: Medium of MARE switching the phone over to speaker phone. We see that she has a rabbit’s foot hanging from the corner of the mirror. Near that a four leaf clover has been taped to the glass.

MARE: Ok, go on.

PSYCHIC (O.P): Yer goin’ ta enter a paceful peeriod.

Panel Two: LS of MARE doing “proud warrior”, (the yoga pose where you place both arms straight out at your sides and you have one knee bent and one leg stretched out to one side, balancing yourself) in what little room she has (the floor is a mess too). The Phone is sitting on her desk now as the psychic’s voice boom forth into the room.

PSYCHIC (O.P): Cut to da chase, yer emanatin such a positive energy, yer eyes are soooo bright and yer smile is soooo charmmin’ dat’cha painlessly gatha all the hearts in yer path.

MARE: But?

Panel Three: Medium of MARE stretching back into a deep backbend.

PSYCHIC (O.P): Paychence cheyel. Das haf yer problem. Yer in such a goddamn hurry all da time. Now, do ya want ta hear da rest of dis o not?

MARE: I’m not paying you 3.75 a minute for my health.

PSYCHIC (O.P.): Heh, what about yer mental health?

Panel Four: Medium LS of MARE kicking up high at a stuff animal she’s hung (noose like) from the archway of the very short hallway/breezeway of her room that leads to the door. Her kick is quite impressive, knocking the toy up and away.

MARE: I try not to think about it anymore.

Page Three, Four Panels:

Panel One: CU of MARE spinning a butterfly knife about in her fingers. She’s chewing on a beef jerky stick (slim jim whatever).

MARE: So, you gonna get to this negative some time today or what?

PSYCHIC (O.P): Yer a hardheaded one, aincha?

MARE: Don’t need to be a psychic to figure that out, lady.

Panel Two: CU of MARE slipping the closed knife into her boot.

PSYCHIC: Well, hart wise, beware o temptations cuz the opposition ‘tween da stars Thien Su and Hoa Quyen are great.

Panel Three: Loose CU of MARE (still chewing on her jerky looking over a folder)

MARE: I’m not worried about the heart stuff. Skip it.

PSYCHIC (O.P): Skip it?

MARE: Please.

Panel Four: Medium of MARE walking away from us, back to her bed. Her desk is in the foreground. We can see some of the papers within the folder she just dropped behind. A surveillance picture of a middle aged guy in a nice suit shaking hands with a few dignitaries is on top. The cellphone is half buried under the folders.

PSYCHIC (O.P): Den what do ya want?

MARE: I told you when I called.

Page Four, Three Panels:

Panel One: CU of MARE laying on her back on her messy bed, staring wearily up at her ceiling.

MARE: What do all the people who call you want?

Panel Two: Medium side angle of MARE she’s rolled onto her side now. We’ve pulled back a bit to see more of the bed. It’s a mess and various small boxes with caliber numbers written on the sides are laying nearby. She has one box in her hand and is tapping the lid.

MARE: Why does anyone bother waste twenty dollars to listen to you guys stall and stall?

Panel Three: Loose CU of MARE up on her elbows holding a gun in her hands and peering through the empty chambers.

MARE: I want to know my future, Miss Clara.

Page Five, Six Panels:

Panel One: CU of the cellphone. It’s flashing the words: INCOMING CALL.

Cellphone: BEEP BEEP BEEP!

MARE (O.P) Damn it.

Panel Two: MS of MARE holding her phone under her chin while slapping a clip up into a gun.

MARE: Miss Clara, stay on the line… this will only take a sec…

MARE (linked): Steven? Hi! Oh no, I was just talking to a friend, nothing too important. You’re picking me up -- uh, wow!

Panel Three: Loose MS of MARE holding the files from earlier over the “bathroom” sink while lighting the end with a Zippo.

MARE: Well actually I’m not home. Hmm? NO… no I’m standing on a subway platform actually. Yeah, my provider rocks.

Panel Four: LS of MARE rapidly throwing her hitman gear together. In the foreground the fire is eating the files which she’s discarding into the sink. We can read the name STEPHAN REGAN under the picture of the nice man with the dignitaries.

MARE: Why don’t I just meet you there, kay? Yeah… I know not very romantic. Well, you gotta do what you gotta do. Where are you now? Uh huh. Okay. Give me twenty minutes. These trains are acting a bit nuts tonight, I might have missed mine. K, see ya soon.

Panel Five: CU of MARE standing before her mirror again. She’s touching her rabbit’s foot. In her other hand she’s holding her phone out away from herself again, flipping it back on speaker.

MARE: Miss Clara? My future?

PSYCHIC (OP): I-I don’t know, luv. Ya can’t jus pin point-

Phone fx: Beep

Panel Six: Low angle Medium MS of Mare holding the phone at her side now her whole body has slumped. She looks defeated already. In the foreground we see a wrinkled newspaper with the horoscopes in sight. The listing for Taurus is most prominent and reads:

Newspaper: Taurus: The actions of the past have come back to haunt you. Time to take stock and re-evaluate what matters most. A errant path can lead to hard times. The end of a long journey is near.

end

Curfew - 2006 Practice Script

2007-02-19T20:07:00.002-05:00

**one i created just for practice with dialogue**

Curfew

Ielle Palmer

2006

PAGE ONE, Splash Page

Splash Page: A young teenage girl peacefully looks over the rooftops of a small city landscape. It’s late night, way past her time to be out, but she looks as though she doesn’t have a care in the world. Her arms are lifted up as if she is about to fly.

PAGE TWO, Three Panels

Panel One: Silhouette of her falling off the building contrasted against the moonlight and street lights, she continues to appear peaceful. Her back is arched along with the arms, like a bird.

Panel Two: CU of her suddenly looking concerned

Panel Three: MS of her clawing the air as she plummets down

MAUDY: Oh shhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh---!

PAGE THREE, Four Panels

Panel One: CU of another hand grabbing her mid air

Panel Two: MS high angle of her hanging off the arm of a boy of the same age, there’s a strong resemblance between them. The boy’s other arm is wrapped around the end of old raised fire escape ladder.

MATT: Told ya.

Panel Three: CU of Maudy climbing up his back with ease.

MAUDY: Shut up, Matthew...

Panel Four: CU of Maudy Stepping on Matt’s face, crushing his nose a bit.

MAUDY: …It was worth a try.

MATT: Ah…ow!

PAGE FOUR, Four Panels

Panel One: CU of a screw coming loose on the fire escape ladder right beside Maudy’s nose, she sees this and her eyes widen

MAUDY (quietly) uh oh.

MATT (from below) Uh OH?

Panel Two: Wide angle of the ladder breaking loose and the two of them tumbling backwards with it.

SOUND (from both teens): AHHHHHHHHHHHHH

INSERT BETWEEN FRAMES SOUND: CRASH!

Panel Three: Now on the dirty back alley’s street, Mathew is sitting up rubbing his elbow.

MATT: DAMN IT MAUDE ANN!!

MATT: Maude Ann?

Panel Four: legs are sticking out from beside a dumpster, lifeless.

MATT: Maudy?

PAGE FIVE, Four Panels

Panel One: MS of Maudy, she looks like death. Her head has smashed against the dumpster and blood is running down her nose. We can see her arm is dislocated.

MATT: Aw man… you ruined your shirt. How are we going to explain that to mom?

Panel Two: She still looks dead, Matt is leaning over her, slowly starting to look concerned.

MATT: M-Maudy?

Panel Three: CU of Maudy reaching forward toward him with her arms out like a zombie and her eyes bulging. The art should be something that could easily be found in any Romero film or the Walking Dead series, minus the decaying flesh.

MAUDY: UGHHHHH!!!

Panel Four: MS of Matt looking pissed. She’s laughing and dusting herself off.

MATT: Hardy har, you’re a brat.

MAUDY: I felt it was my sisterly duty.

PAGE SIX, Five Panels

Panel One: Maude snaps her neck, popping everything back in place with absolutely no pain. She acts as if she’s done nothing more than popped a kink out of her neck. Matt acts as if he’s seen this a million times before.

Panel Two: CU of Maudy rubbing her nose and the blood seems to have vanished, along with all the other bruises.

MAUDY: How do I look?

MATT: Ugly. But you’ll pass mom’s radar… except for that shirt.

Panel Three: Matt is hovering a few inches above the ground while Maudy leans forward holding her arms behind her, popping her fingers like a pianist doing a crazed yoga pose. She is peaking up from below at her floating brother.

MAUDY: Stop that, someone will see.

MATT: I thought we came here to practice.

MAUDY: Yeah well, we’re done.

Panel Four: TIGHT MS of Matt as he drifts backwards, lounging like he’s on an invisible recliner

MATT: Aw, I’m having fun.

MAUDY: Well I’m not.

MATT: That’s because you can’t fly.

Panel Five: CU of a fist smashing Matt backward.

MATT: Oomph!

PAGE SEVEN, Six Panels

Panel One: Matt is kneeling on the ground rubbing his jaw. Maudy is standing over him, arms crossed looking around as if she’s worried someone might have seen, but not all that concerned that he’s on the floor.

MATT: yu boc ma jah! Ahhh owww.

MAUDY: Oh shut up and snap it back

Panel Two: CU of Matt holding his jaw and looking up at her pissed.

MATT: I cann!

Panel Three: MS of Maude kneeling next to him. She has her hand on his jaw, forcing him to turn from side to side so she can inspect it. This is apparently even more painful and he’s trying to shove her off him.

MAUDY: oh…. Oh. Whoops. heh, heh... ahem.

MATT: Whuufs? Whuufs! Mawwd!!

Panel Four: LS of the twins walking (well Matt somewhat floating) down the alley. Maudy is leading the way, but walking backwards so she can face him. Her body language shows that she’s a bit sorry, but she refuses to let him know that. Matt is still messing with his face.

MAUDY: Well how was I suppose to know you have a glass jaw?

MATT: I don habe a glass jaw…ahh. You hih harr.

MAUDY: Such a baby.

Panel Five: Cu of them squaring off again, nearly nose to nose.

MATT: Bit

MAUDE: What did you call me?

Panel Six: Same Shot, but the twins are staring at each other in surprise as a scream from another alley echoes out.

WOMAN’S VOICE: (burst) FIRE!

PAGE EIGHT, Four Panels

Panel One: LS of the twins poking their heads around the corner of another side alley

MATT: Do you shee it?

MAUDY: Uh no…there’s no fire.

Panel Two: Low angle of Maude running full speed into the furthest reaches of the alley. Matt is still holding his jaw, looking surprised.

WOMAN’S VOICE: (burst) Somebody HELP ME!!

MAUDY: Holy shit, someone’s being attacked! Come on!

MATT: Way, wha?!

Panel Three: MS of Maudy pile driving like a NFL pro into the side of a masked man armed with a knife, the purse he was holding flies up into the air while backed against a wall, a woman looks horrified by what’s going on. An second mugger, who is pressing his gun into the woman’s jaw, also looks surprised by what’s happened.

MUGGER 1 SOUND: OOF!

Panel Four: MS of the armed mugger switching his sights from the victim to Maudy. Behind him we can see Matt flying at him with is hand stretched forward, hoping to reach him. The gun is already breaking apart. Lines are spreading out all over it, like crackle paint or something you would see after smashing your hand on a saltine, yet no one has touched it.

MUGGER 2: What the f-fu--?

MATT: Mawwdy!

Sound: SNAP! CRUNCH!

PAGE NINE, Five Panels

Panel One: CU (shoulders up) of the guy, terrified as he watches it turn to dust within his hands and filter through his grasp.

Panel Two: the now unarmed gunman scurries away as Matt is playing with some of the dirt left from the gun. The victim is still against the wall, more terrified and confused now than before. Maude is bitch slapping the first mugger in the foreground.

MATT: Wow.

MAUDY: Matt!

MATT: Wha?

MAUDY: He’s getting away!

Panel Three: CU of Matt suddenly getting it. He smirks and thrusts his hand out.

MATT: Doan thing foe.

Panel Four: MS of the mugger covering his head as pieces of the neighboring building shower down on him.

Panel Five: Maudy looks away from her own fight in awe, forgetting what she’s doing. Behind her the mugger is fumbling around for something, preparing to attack.

MAUDY: No way!

PAGE TEN, Six Panels

Panel One: CU of Matt looking rather pleased with himself.

Panel Two: Same shot, but Matt looks terrified and tries to shout out.

MATT: (burst) OOK OW!!

Panel Three: CU of the knife lashing out through the air.

Panel Four: The blade stops short of Maudy’s back as if it’s hit some invisible shield. She's already begun to turn around.

Panel Five: CU of Maudy as she taps the knife so it spins to face him. Her face looks almost evil now.

MAUDY: Sic em.

Panel Six: LS of the man running away screaming as his knife is now chasing him out of the alley.

PAGE ELEVEN, Three Panels

Panel One: Wide shot of Matt sliding up beside his sister, who seems happily surprised at her new power. Also looks shocked by this new development

MATT: Di you know you coo do dat?

MAUDY: Do I look like I knew?

Sound: CRASH!

Panel Two: Same shot as before, but the twins have separated and turned so that we can now see what’s behind them. The victim is trying to pick herself back up from the garbage can she’s just tripped over. She’s holding a can of mace up at the twins, while her purse dangles from her elbow.

WOMAN: Stay away from me. You just stay back!

MAUDY: Well, that’s gratitude.

MATT: Yea.

Panel three: High Angle looking down at the alley. The woman is running off in the opposite direction as fast as she can. The one mugger’s legs are sticking out from under the rubble and the twins are walking (well Matt is hovering) off together in another.

MAUDY: Pizza?

MATT: Pee-sha.

Spiderman Sample Script: Protection - 2006

2007-02-19T20:00:00.002-05:00

**another short script created for penciljack's sample scripts for artists thread. Again based on McKeever's SMLMJ Series**

Protection

Ielle Palmer
2006
PAGE ONE, Five Panels

Panel One: CU of fingers dialing on a cellphone

Panel Two: Fullshot of teenaged MJ walking down a flight of stairs leading into the subway. In the background we can see a couple walking up the stairs, heading for the surface. Other than that, she is alone and it’s night.

MJ: Mom? Uh, why aren’t you home? Ok, well I’m probably just talking to myself, but I had to stay late to help with inventory. I’m catching the last train out right now, so I should be home in about a half hour…

Panel Three: CU of MJ nervously waiting for the train, being careful not to stand anywhere near the edge. She’s watching a bum who is squatting down on the platform near the mouth of the subway tunnel, a bit worried by his behavior.

MJ:…sure would be nice if you met me at the station with the car. Hope everything’s-

Answering Machine: (over phone) BEEEP!

Panel Four: MS of MJ is closing her cellphone and pulling her coat tighter with the other hand. She is looking down at her feet, depressed. The bum is shuffling off up the stairs. From the tunnel, odd noises begin to erupt.

MJ: *sigh* Love you.

Sound: SCREECH, SCREECH

Panel Five: Low angle Medium LS of MJ stepping closer to the edge of the platform. Curiousity has taken hold.

MJ: …?

PAGE TWO, Six panels

Panel One: WA LS of the Green Goblin’s flying machine completely out of control, bumping into the opposite wall of the platform. GG is waving one arm up, trying to shake off Spiderman who is clinging onto GG’s neck for dear life. Spidey’s legs are flailing up behind them. MS of MJ watching in the foreground, her back is to us but we can tell from her body language that while she’s terrified, she’s exhilarated as well.

Spidey: Whooooooooa!

Spidey: (linked) You know, that’s gonna wreak havoc on the resale.

MJ: Ohmagawd! Spiderman?

Panel Two: CU of Spiderman turning his head, noticing her.

SPIDERMAN: Mary Jane?

Panel Three: Medium LS of Spiderman falling backwards towards track as GG spins his flying machine up and off to the left towards the platform. MJ is ducking, although he’s not close to her.

Panel Four: MS of Spiderman hitting the subway tracks hard.

Panel Five: LS of GG riding his machine off up the stairway to the surface. CU of MJ’s in the foreground. She’s lying on the platform, terrified. She’s peaking back over her shoulder at GG escaping.

Spidey (OP): (weakly) Anyone get his plate number?

Panel Six: Tight MS of Spidey slowly getting up. He looks down the tunnel only to see the lights of oncoming subway train.

Spidey: Doesn’t feel like anything is…

Spidey: (link) …broken?

Spidey: (link) aw, crap.

PAGE THREE, Four panels

Panel One: Medium LS of Spidey jumping backwards up onto the platform beside MJ (who is standing now).

Panel Two: Loose CU of Spidey nearly falling off the edge, his nose is inches from the subway train that’s barreling by. But MJ’s hand is firmly holding him by the shoulder, pulling him back. She looks surprised to be saving him, as much as he appears surprised that he didn’t quite nail his landing.

Panel Three: CU of Spidey standing on the edge of the platform, He is still facing the tracks, but his head is turned to look at her. MJ is staring at him dreamily, a cheesy grin has found its way across her face.

Spidey: Uh… thanks.

MJ: No problem, but he got away.

Spidey: Yeah, saw that. It’s a little late for you to be out alone, isn’t it?

MJ: Uh, who just saved whom?

Spidey: whh…I-I need to go get him.

Panel Four: LS Spidey is slinging his way up the stairs to the surface. Loose CU of MJ inside the subway watching him through the glass. She is completely under his spell. She looks like a lovesick kitten. That same stupid grin is still plastered across her face.

Page Four, Three Panels

Panel One: Ext. Subway station - Queens. LS of MJ standing on the semi-shoveled sidewalk outside the subway exit, looking around depressed. Her mother has not come for her.

Panel Two: Tight MS of MJ looking back to see Peter approaching her.

Peter: MJ?

MJ: Peter? What are you doing here?

Peter: Late tutoring session. Want to walk back together? I mean it’s late and-

Panel Three: LS of MJ and Peter as they head down the street. She teasingly bumps him with her shoulder. Her arm is already linked around his. She grins micheviously at him, as he reddens and stares at his feet.

MJ: Sure Peter…

MJ (link): I’ll protect ya.

Spiderman Sample Script: "Devil's Advocate" - 2006

2007-02-19T19:39:00.002-05:00

**a short sample script for artists that I created for the webforum: Penciljack. It's based of Sean McKeever's Spiderman Loves Mary Jane Series **

Devil’s Advocate

Ielle Palmer

2006

PAGE ONE, Six Panels

Panel One: Evening - Fullshot of Spiderman smashing into a park water fountain, kicking up a huge spray every which way. Various people nearby are looking up alarmed.

CAPTION: "He’s not a menace!"

SPIDEY: Oofff!

Panel Two: Medium LS of DOC OC using one of his mechanical arms to lift Spidey up by the jaw and shake him.

CAPTION: “Liz… he’s just misunderstood.”

CAPTION 2: “Ugh, here we go. Harry, make her stop.”

Panel Three: LS of Doc tossing Spidey away towards some benches.

CAPTION: “Oh no, I’m not getting involved, this is between you two.”

Panel Four: CU of Spidey’s thrusting his hands outward, his webs spring outward.

CAPTION: “He’s a freak MJ…”

Panel Five: Spidey sling shots himself around a lamp-post and is heading back at DOC OC (MS of DOC in the foreground, ready to fight) his foot outstretched so that it’ll be the first thing to hit DOC.

CAPTION: “…They say he’s the reason all these other nutjobs are popping up all over town…”

Panel Six: CU of Spidey’s foot connecting with Doc’s jaw, smashing his face sideways.

CAPTION: “...for godsake, the man’s killed people!”

PAGE TWO, Four Panels

Panel One: LS of Spidey flying off away from the scene as cops are arriving. Doc OC is in the foreground, tied up in webbing and unconscious.

CAPTION: “Oh, that stupid Daily Bugle. It gets everything wrong. Liz, if only you knew him like I do.”

Panel Two: LS of Spidey in the background leaning on the billboard letters atop of the awning of an old second run movieplex. In the foreground we see MJ, Flash, Harry and Liz laughing & rough housing while leaving from a late night film. They seem so happy having a normal teenage life. Meanwhile Spidey’s posture shows how he wishes that he could be down there with them.

CAPTION: “Oh-my-god! You don’t know him MJ! You’ve met him, what... twice? And if I remember correctly, he didn’t stick around very long either time.”

CAPTION 2: “What, you’ve never made a snap judgment about someone?”

Panel Three: CU of Spidey ducking as a laser blast misses him and smashes into the bricks behind him. His spidey-senses have been tripped, but nearly too late thanks to the MJ distraction.

CAPTION: “…I’ve seen what he can do. If anything, he goes out of his way not to hurt anyone. Even the nutjobs you're talking about.”

Panel Four: Same angle as panel two. Except now Spidey has lept off the movie marquee and is swinging through NYC chasing after Green Goblin who is speeding off on his flying machine. Below MJ and her gang have stopped to watch in aw, MJ the most impressed of all.

CAPTION: “He’s never asked for anything in exchange. He goes out there and tries to make a difference and all you can do is sit here complain. You’re such a brat!”

GG: Hee hee hee hee!!

Spidey: (just the standard angry scribble cloud, no actual dialogue)

PAGE THREE, Six Panels

Panel One: Fullshot of Spidey on a rooftop taking a break, holding a soda, his mask is pushed up over his nose. His shoulders are sagging from exhaustion, his head hanging a bit. His back is to the city, the back of his feet hang just over the edge of the rooftop.

CAPTION: “…We should be begging his forgiveness and throwing him tinker-tape parades!”

CAPTION 2: “…Please Harry, she’s killing me.”

Woman (O.P): Help!

Spidey: *sigh*

Panel Two: Ext. Queens – We’re back in Peter’s semi-nice neighborhood. LS of Spidey hanging upside down from a tree, passing a cat back to some eager old woman. Dawn is starting to break.
CAPTION: “Jesus MJ, Liz’s right. You make him out to be a saint.”

Panel Three: High Angle MS of teenaged Liz, MJ and Harry sitting around a table in the library talking. Annoyed, Liz is throwing up her hands at Harry (who is leaning away from her, since she looks as though she could easily bring her arms down and smack him in the face). Across from them, MJ has turned her attention to a nearby table, where PETER is sitting in the background, passed out into one of his books.

Liz: Do you see? Do you see what I deal with every fricken day? Spiderman this, Spiderman that. It’s not healthy!

MJ: Peter?

Panel Four: MS of Mary Jane now leaning on Peter’s table looking down at him, concerned. Peter is trying to wipe the drool away and not look like a retard in front of her. He’s completely embarrassed that she found him like that. In the background we can still see Liz flipping out on Harry, who still looks concerned for his own safety.

PETER: Oh, uh sorry… Hi MJ.

MJ: Don’t take this the wrong way Peter, but you look horrible.

PETER: Thanks?

MJ: If you want, we could reschedule our tutoring thing tonight-

Panel Five: MS of MJ sitting across from Peter smiling away. She’s looking at his books to see what he’s reading. He on the other hand can’t take his eyes off her.

PETER: No!... I-I mean, you’re not getting out of algebra that easy.

MJ: Honestly Peter Parker, if I didn’t know any better I’d say you were out living it up last night. Silly, huh?

Panel Six: CU of Peter, utterly exhausted and sheepishly looking off to the side.

Peter: Yeah, silly.